Five Signs You Might Be a Shitty Rapper #KYL

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It seems like wack rappers don’t know they’re wack, in fact they seem to think they’re the s**t! We call this denial people. Let’s see what things you should avoid if you are a rapper, but let’s also observe and take into account if most of these signs apply to you.

Everything You Talk About Is Some Watered-Down Biggie or Pac Shit

Gangster rap of the ’90s changed the game forever, and the influence of Tupac and Biggie will continue for decades to come. But that’s all it should be — influence. Instead, 20 years after they were shot, most of the rappers on commercial radio are still jacking their lines and stealing their swag. Who taught you to rap about getting money and fucking bitches? What happened to switchin’ up the flow and honest word play? Jay Z is pretty fucking bad about this, but at least Jay actually knew Biggie. Most of you are just bad fifth-generation Xerox copies. You’re so far from the original image, nothin’ but blunt ink splotches taking up space on paper. Check yourself.

You Rap About a Lifestyle You Never Knew

Fakery is rampant in the hip-hop scene. Everyone is either talking about money they don’t have or crimes they never committed. The point of rapping about drug dealing and ghetto living was to raise awareness and spread hope and be real, but now it’s just about celebrating some shit no one in America should ever have to endure. Don’t talk about being ignorant and poor like it’s a badge. It’s even more cruel when you wave that badge around while having come from money and/or after you sold your soul to the music industry creeps. Write some shit that is uplifting, stop holding your fans down.

Your Music Video Relies on Some Naked Woman or Loaned, Flashy Jewelry and Cars to Hide Your Lack of Talent and Personality

Does your music video look like the Home Shopping Network for wannabe thugs? You’re wack as fuck. Fire your stylist, meditate for a few hours, find yourself, and start all over again. You’re right, it’s scary being an individual, but if we all embrace our true selves, the world will be better for it.

You’re Not Kendrick Lamar

Unless you are, you’re not, and science dictates that if you aren’t already, you never will be. But yo, that doesn’t mean you can’t aspire to his level of greatness — or even surpass it. Kendrick brought thoughtful, intelligent lyrics back to radio, and the countdown has begun. All we’re saying is here is the bar, now rise to meet it. If you aren’t willing to stress and strain yourself a bit, get the fuck out of the game. It’s that simple. This has been a public service announcement.

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